Every car is sacred

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We don’t have enough songs singing the praise of the king of our roads, the ruler of our cities, the overlord of public space. Therefore I have adapted a hymn by Monty Python.

Feel free to shoot your own video with these lyrics (with proper credits). Let me know, and I’ll include it in this weblog too of course.

All pictures on this page are screenshots of the YouTube video on the official channel of Monty Python.

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Every car is sacred

FATHER:
There are bikes in the world
There are walkers
There are strollers and scooters, and then
There are those that take public transport, but
I’ve never been one of them

I’m a happy driver,
And have been since my parents taught me,
And the one thing they say about drivers is:
They’ll take their cars even to pee 

You don’t have to be great at parking
You don’t have to have a great brain
You don’t have to like public spaces — You’re
A driver the moment you claim,
Because

Every car is sacred
Every car is great
If a car is wasted,
God gets quite irate
Every car is sacred
Every car is great
If a car is wasted,
God gets quite irate

LITTLE GIRL — SOLO:
Cyclists should wear helmets
Flashy clothing too
God shall make them pay when
Dad can’t park close to school

Every car is wanted
Every car is good
Every car is needed
In your neighbourhood

MOTHER:
Cargo bikes and busses
Claim car lanes everywhere,
But God loves those who treat their
Highways with more care

HOLY STATUES:
God shall strike them down for
Each car that can’t drive past

MEN:
Every car is sacred
Every car is great

WOMEN:
If a car is wasted,

CHILDREN:
God get quite irate

PRIEST:
Every car is sacred

BRIDE and GROOM:
Every car is good

NANNIES:
Every car is needed

CARDINALS:
In your neighbourhood!

CHILDREN:
Every car is useful
Every car is fine

FUNERAL PEOPLE:
Cities need your cars and
Mine!
And mine!

DEAD MAN:
And mine!

NUNS:
Let the cyclists bike in
The alleys, streets, and parks,

ALL:
Every car is sacred
Every car is good
Every car is needed
In your neighbourhood

Every car is sacred
Every car is great
If a car is wasted,
God gets quite iraaaaaate!
[bike rings]